Catamaran, bus and then an auto took us to what I can say was the smallest and the most serene village I have ever been to. You can count the number of houses (or huts) on your finger tips. It was a small, winding road which led us to Shree resort. The road was soo narrow, it could not accommodate two vehicles side by side. The houses looked much like those in my native place. Huts, with a very soothing earthen look and feel. They had a front porch, with trees all around.
Shree resort wasn't really a resort. It was a bungalow owned by a couple which they converted into a resort of sorts by furnishing each room like a hotel room. They were funnily done. The walls of the rooms were coloured in bright colours and the rooms were named after these colours. Green room, Blue room, Orange room :) We went for the orange room, coz it was the most spacious. We hurriedly dumped our bags in the room, freshened up, wore slippers, sparing the shoes the plight of being wet for the rest of the week and left the room.
"The beach is rocky. Mind your footing." cautioned a board outside the room. It contained 10 other precautions that it urged us to take. With that in mind, we went up to the terrace. We could see the beach from there. It was calling me. I guess I was not the only one impatient to meet the ocean. It was calling out to us too. It was getting louder. Without wasting anymore time, fearing we would miss the sunset, we rushed down.
I hate coffee and tea. And that day I hated other coffee and tea drinkers too. All the others in the gang sat down at the nearest and only hotel in kihim to have a cup of tea. TEA??? When you are a few feet away from the beautiful beach, with the sun threatening to disappear? I was getting restless. I raised my apprehension before others, telling them we would miss the sunset. After a loooooong wait, we were up again.
I felt the sand beneath my feet; slightly wet, little coarse. Few more steps and I felt the water. WOW!!! It was the most beautiful feeling. The ocean seemed happy to see us....So happy it wanted to share that happiness with me by splashing water all over us. It was dancing around in joy, singing a happy song, making everyone there wet, soaked in joy.
The sun began to set faster and faster by the second. Slowly the day turned into night. The moon came out. Most of the people there went back to their rooms. We sat there on the beach, staring at nothing. It was pitch dark. The only company which we had was the beach, which continued singing its song and the moon, royally standing there in the sky, it seemed like the king of the night sky.
The ocean teased the moon with its song. The moon flashed light at it praising its beauty. The ocean blushed; its waves shimmered in the moon light. It hummed a pleasant song and splashed its waves all over the beach happily. What a romantic couple, never leaving each others side, playing all through the night, with the little stars watching them in awe!! But this night would have come to an end, giving way to the day ahead and they should part ways; but only with the promise to see each other again the next night.
We sat there singing songs as loudly as possible, trying to be louder than the ocean, but in vain. Time seemed to have stopped. I felt blissful, with no worries what so ever. It was the feeling of pure happiness. It was when our stomachs started grumbling in hunger that we were brought back to the real world. Oh! We were so hungry after all the traveling and playing around on the beach.
We came back to the resort, had dinner and went up to the terrace. By now all the stars had come on to the skyline. There were so many of them, they seemed to be fighting for space. I have never seen such a wonderfully start studded skyline since kalpakkam. This was a clear indication of how pollution free, untouched and natural this place was. It was just like what god created; original and untampered.
As I gazed the sky and got lost in it, I saw sriram, saurabh and nandu discussing some strange head shake that they had come up with. My guess is it was some kind of acknowledgement for the most 'silly and smart' PJs or TJs they come up with. They had gone crazy or should I say craziER? I showed off the miniscule amount of constellation knowledge that I had. Slowly people started dozing off. Nandu slept off in no time. I had other plans.
I looked at the most extraordinary sky, with all its jewels for as long as I could. It was a spectacle to watch. Well the sky was showing off its assets too!! The pristine beauty of the sky could make any model or actress look ordinary. God has created such wonders for us to explore and relish; and what have we done to them!! In mumbai, you can never see more than a dozen stars in the sky at night. All you can see is the pink sky(because of the SO2 emissions), polluted by all sort of pollutants. That day I realized what mumbaikars were missing each day of their lives.
It was 12 in the night. Saurabh suddenly gets up, goes down and brings a music system and starts fiddling with the wires, trying to fix the FM radio. These hardware people cannot go too long without getting their hands on something. Well, the enormous silence of the night was broken with a song of HIMESH!!! After tuning all possible channels, we settled to some old melodies of kishore da and lata mangeshkar. I used to think saurabh was a man of few (wise) words. But that day he was determined to prove me wrong. Boy! Once he gets going, it is difficult to stop him. We spoke for more than an hour about a wide range of topics, none of which I remember now :-) Then I felt tired, forced saurabh to switch the radio off and sleep. I gazed at the night sky for some more time, and slowly dozing off into the dream world.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
A final Dash (Part II)
The catamaran swayed from one side to the other and cruised forward at the same time. We checked on each other for motion sickness. This problem heightens in boats since it moves in almost all directions possible. DG was ready with Polo for all of us. We popped one in our mouths and leaned back to enjoy the ride.
It is a beautiful feeling to move on water. It's not as if you feel like a fish or anything, but just the feeling of water all around you is pretty good. Nandu as usual was guessing the speed of the catamaran. After a few estimations, we all agreed it would not be more than 15 to 20 kmph. We were told it would take around 45 mins to reach Mandwa. Yes, Mandwa jetty was where we were headed. That was not the place of visit actually, but it was the connecting place. We had to take a bus from there and then an auto. 10 minutes might have passed and the Mumbai horizon started fading away. It was a nice sight. Going away from the noise, pollution and the crowd. We could see nothing but vague outlines of the skyscrapers. I must look forward, literally and also look forward for what is in store for us in the trip and told myself not to look behind.
I was silent from then on. I wanted to enjoy the ride and i can enjoy it the most when i am silent and just looking at the beauty around me. Many small and big ships passed by - some looked brand new, some were so old and so horribly rusted, that we wondered why on earth were they left anchored in the middle of the sea. They looked abandoned to us. Moreover, there was no kind of equipment too on deck. Well Nandu and Saurabh had theories reagarding this too. But i was too lazy to listen to them. But i should say this; I have always wondered how nandu has all the information that he keeping giving us poor souls. U take a topic and he knows about it. I have rarely heard him replying with an "I dont know". He talks about ships, boats, catamarans (when many of us had never heard of it before in our lives), software, hardware, new gadgets, mobile phones...and ya when it comes to mobile phones, he seems to know everything inside out. His is a typical inquisitive mind. Such people will never grow old; mentally atleast. They always have something or the other they are interested in and keep learning new things whenever they find an opportunity to do so. You are a great chap nandu!
The time was now around 4 : 15 i think. Again i was too lazy to even lift my hand and look at my watch. I guessed it would be 4 : 15, coz it was quite some time since we left from Gateway. The horizon now looked most beautiful - endless. The sun was a bright orange red; just like the way I used to paint it in my younger days. And yes there was also this black streak accross it - again like the paintings. Andy felt it looked like a highway had been built accross the sun. Well that was an interesting imagination. I stared at the sun for as long as i could. It was the evening time and the sun got milder and started dipping. It was 'five inches' above the horizon. I remember i used to wonder where the sun went from down under each day after sunset when i was a kid. I never bothered to ask anyone about this, I just wondered. At that moment i somehow caught myself kiddishly wondering about the same thing. Well i do have my science in place and i know the 'concepts' of rotations and revolutions. But it was not about knowing or not knowing. It was something different. May be my mind was too tired of logic. It wanted to wander, it wanted to be free and i let it be that way. I was relaxed. 2 more mins and I would have slept off. Suddenly someone pointed in a direction and said it was looking like a beach. I sat upright to look. There was lot of green and blue to see. And a thin yellowish golden patch connecting the two(palm trees and the sea). Within seconds i woke up from the slumber and was wide awake. Yes! that was the beach, we all agreed unanimously.
We could see the beach approaching us. I didnt bother to look back. Mumbai was out of my mind. 10 more minutes and we anchored. It was Mandwajetty. It was very breezy there. There was a narrow but long walk way built on to the water body. It stood on huge and seemingly strong pillars. We could see beaches on both sides of the walk way. Everything except the wind was calm. The breeze was too strong to go unnoticed. It hit me hard from one side as i tried to walk across it. The wind was too loud. It was saying something for sure. But i am not 'The Alchemist' to understand the language of the wind. But i assumed it was welcoming us there and wishing us a pleasant journey ahead. I thanked it and hoped it would really be wonderful.
It is a beautiful feeling to move on water. It's not as if you feel like a fish or anything, but just the feeling of water all around you is pretty good. Nandu as usual was guessing the speed of the catamaran. After a few estimations, we all agreed it would not be more than 15 to 20 kmph. We were told it would take around 45 mins to reach Mandwa. Yes, Mandwa jetty was where we were headed. That was not the place of visit actually, but it was the connecting place. We had to take a bus from there and then an auto. 10 minutes might have passed and the Mumbai horizon started fading away. It was a nice sight. Going away from the noise, pollution and the crowd. We could see nothing but vague outlines of the skyscrapers. I must look forward, literally and also look forward for what is in store for us in the trip and told myself not to look behind.
I was silent from then on. I wanted to enjoy the ride and i can enjoy it the most when i am silent and just looking at the beauty around me. Many small and big ships passed by - some looked brand new, some were so old and so horribly rusted, that we wondered why on earth were they left anchored in the middle of the sea. They looked abandoned to us. Moreover, there was no kind of equipment too on deck. Well Nandu and Saurabh had theories reagarding this too. But i was too lazy to listen to them. But i should say this; I have always wondered how nandu has all the information that he keeping giving us poor souls. U take a topic and he knows about it. I have rarely heard him replying with an "I dont know". He talks about ships, boats, catamarans (when many of us had never heard of it before in our lives), software, hardware, new gadgets, mobile phones...and ya when it comes to mobile phones, he seems to know everything inside out. His is a typical inquisitive mind. Such people will never grow old; mentally atleast. They always have something or the other they are interested in and keep learning new things whenever they find an opportunity to do so. You are a great chap nandu!
The time was now around 4 : 15 i think. Again i was too lazy to even lift my hand and look at my watch. I guessed it would be 4 : 15, coz it was quite some time since we left from Gateway. The horizon now looked most beautiful - endless. The sun was a bright orange red; just like the way I used to paint it in my younger days. And yes there was also this black streak accross it - again like the paintings. Andy felt it looked like a highway had been built accross the sun. Well that was an interesting imagination. I stared at the sun for as long as i could. It was the evening time and the sun got milder and started dipping. It was 'five inches' above the horizon. I remember i used to wonder where the sun went from down under each day after sunset when i was a kid. I never bothered to ask anyone about this, I just wondered. At that moment i somehow caught myself kiddishly wondering about the same thing. Well i do have my science in place and i know the 'concepts' of rotations and revolutions. But it was not about knowing or not knowing. It was something different. May be my mind was too tired of logic. It wanted to wander, it wanted to be free and i let it be that way. I was relaxed. 2 more mins and I would have slept off. Suddenly someone pointed in a direction and said it was looking like a beach. I sat upright to look. There was lot of green and blue to see. And a thin yellowish golden patch connecting the two(palm trees and the sea). Within seconds i woke up from the slumber and was wide awake. Yes! that was the beach, we all agreed unanimously.
We could see the beach approaching us. I didnt bother to look back. Mumbai was out of my mind. 10 more minutes and we anchored. It was Mandwajetty. It was very breezy there. There was a narrow but long walk way built on to the water body. It stood on huge and seemingly strong pillars. We could see beaches on both sides of the walk way. Everything except the wind was calm. The breeze was too strong to go unnoticed. It hit me hard from one side as i tried to walk across it. The wind was too loud. It was saying something for sure. But i am not 'The Alchemist' to understand the language of the wind. But i assumed it was welcoming us there and wishing us a pleasant journey ahead. I thanked it and hoped it would really be wonderful.
A final Dash...
Three months after college reopened...a month after we had gone out with friends on an outing...a week after the symposia got over.......
A week to the start of submission...a month to vivas...two months to the final exams.......
At this juncture, drained out of all the work we had done (most out of force and some out of sheer passion) it was time for a retreat...we all felt the need for it. A final dash before the rigorous drill for the exams start. We had to go out of the hustle bustle of mumbai, the frustrations of college and the monotony day to day work.
During the "free" hours of practicals, we all roped in people with a similar mindset, a similar need to give oneself a break, into the idea of going to some peaceful place outside mumbai for a day and have fun with friends. Two hours later there were six people sitting at the table in the canteen carelessly putting down the baggage that we carry to the college daily to 'plan' the trip.
We started by going through the various options, the funds that each of the possibilities will attract from each one of us, the convenience of travel and the willingness of the people involved. All the organising skills that we learnt through the four years of engineering and society work came of good use here. An hour and few calls later, a tentative paln was in place. We were to finalise after i spoke to vishy about a place that he calls 'a home away from home'.
As if this were the most important meeting of the year, 9 o clock sharp, all of us were online. Not one person was late. By then Sahil(one of the best organisers i have seen) had spoken to Mr. Kurde and finalised a package for us. Rs 200 per day for the accomodation and food all day. That wasnt bad...not bad at all. The word passed and in no time, we were all busy packing...hoping that it would be a good trip...something worth remembering....
Ah! but before that, there was another hurdle to pass. DCN test. I didnt bother to even browse through the book. I trust my friends a lot. I believe in them. With the same belief and confidence, i went to college next day BEFORE TIME. It is only on test days, that the whole class-all seventy of us remember the word 'punctuality'. Actually, it is more of giving yourself a best chance even after no preperation than punctuality. But how does it matter. For me with all the excitment about the trip, it was just another hurdle to cross.
The papers were in palce, lines drawn on them, the right partners sitting besides you, the correct palcement of sincere students in close proximity and the 'reference material' in place. Now the wait began. 8:40, 8:50, 9:00. I started to get impatient. Many did. Slowly it dawned on us that the test wasnt going to happen. How frustrating. All this hard work for NO TEST? I could have woken up later, i could have sung another song in the bathroom, i could have walked up to the bus stop instead of ricking it up. What a waste of invaluable time and money.
Any way, slowly the lectures dragged on as usual. Meanwhile, gautam dropped out of the plan because his grandfather was ill. We were now reduced to 6. Soon it was 1 pm . We got out of our labs and in groups of two dashed in different directions with some last minute work. We were all to meet at the gate way of india at 3. Sriram and dg went to dg's palce to get her luggage, nandu and sarurabh went to ashay's palce to get the all important camera and andy and I went down to the lab to demonstrate our project to our guide. The urge to get out of the lab and catch that train to VT was growing into impatience now. Finally we were releaved.
We met nandu and saurbah at the station and took a taxi to the gate way. Nothing was more important to us than getting those tickets for the catameron. Within no time, I had the tickets in in my bag. There was a wait of half an hour before we could board the catemeron. Nandu was busy exploring the differences between a catameron and a ferry. How beautifully has engineering groomed us. Where ever we go, whatever we find, we see characteristics, features and differences. Saurabh was busy looking for a 'shady' place to sit and ended up standing all the time in the sun. Ram and dg joined us soon and the we were busy getting the equipment up and running for the trip. It was time for testing. Two snaps and a short vedio later, we were ready.
The catemeron arrived sharp at 3:30. We hopped on to it, found ourselves good seats, settled down and with the blow of a horn, we were on the move. One of the best times of our lives had just begun...
A week to the start of submission...a month to vivas...two months to the final exams.......
At this juncture, drained out of all the work we had done (most out of force and some out of sheer passion) it was time for a retreat...we all felt the need for it. A final dash before the rigorous drill for the exams start. We had to go out of the hustle bustle of mumbai, the frustrations of college and the monotony day to day work.
During the "free" hours of practicals, we all roped in people with a similar mindset, a similar need to give oneself a break, into the idea of going to some peaceful place outside mumbai for a day and have fun with friends. Two hours later there were six people sitting at the table in the canteen carelessly putting down the baggage that we carry to the college daily to 'plan' the trip.
We started by going through the various options, the funds that each of the possibilities will attract from each one of us, the convenience of travel and the willingness of the people involved. All the organising skills that we learnt through the four years of engineering and society work came of good use here. An hour and few calls later, a tentative paln was in place. We were to finalise after i spoke to vishy about a place that he calls 'a home away from home'.
As if this were the most important meeting of the year, 9 o clock sharp, all of us were online. Not one person was late. By then Sahil(one of the best organisers i have seen) had spoken to Mr. Kurde and finalised a package for us. Rs 200 per day for the accomodation and food all day. That wasnt bad...not bad at all. The word passed and in no time, we were all busy packing...hoping that it would be a good trip...something worth remembering....
Ah! but before that, there was another hurdle to pass. DCN test. I didnt bother to even browse through the book. I trust my friends a lot. I believe in them. With the same belief and confidence, i went to college next day BEFORE TIME. It is only on test days, that the whole class-all seventy of us remember the word 'punctuality'. Actually, it is more of giving yourself a best chance even after no preperation than punctuality. But how does it matter. For me with all the excitment about the trip, it was just another hurdle to cross.
The papers were in palce, lines drawn on them, the right partners sitting besides you, the correct palcement of sincere students in close proximity and the 'reference material' in place. Now the wait began. 8:40, 8:50, 9:00. I started to get impatient. Many did. Slowly it dawned on us that the test wasnt going to happen. How frustrating. All this hard work for NO TEST? I could have woken up later, i could have sung another song in the bathroom, i could have walked up to the bus stop instead of ricking it up. What a waste of invaluable time and money.
Any way, slowly the lectures dragged on as usual. Meanwhile, gautam dropped out of the plan because his grandfather was ill. We were now reduced to 6. Soon it was 1 pm . We got out of our labs and in groups of two dashed in different directions with some last minute work. We were all to meet at the gate way of india at 3. Sriram and dg went to dg's palce to get her luggage, nandu and sarurabh went to ashay's palce to get the all important camera and andy and I went down to the lab to demonstrate our project to our guide. The urge to get out of the lab and catch that train to VT was growing into impatience now. Finally we were releaved.
We met nandu and saurbah at the station and took a taxi to the gate way. Nothing was more important to us than getting those tickets for the catameron. Within no time, I had the tickets in in my bag. There was a wait of half an hour before we could board the catemeron. Nandu was busy exploring the differences between a catameron and a ferry. How beautifully has engineering groomed us. Where ever we go, whatever we find, we see characteristics, features and differences. Saurabh was busy looking for a 'shady' place to sit and ended up standing all the time in the sun. Ram and dg joined us soon and the we were busy getting the equipment up and running for the trip. It was time for testing. Two snaps and a short vedio later, we were ready.
The catemeron arrived sharp at 3:30. We hopped on to it, found ourselves good seats, settled down and with the blow of a horn, we were on the move. One of the best times of our lives had just begun...
Monday, May 01, 2006
Friends for LIFE...
Yesterday during our farewell party, once people got too tired of dancing and had reached near zero energy levels, they started coming on stage and talking about their experiences in the four years, about the friends that they made and how they cherish their friendships with them...These events drove me into deep thought. "Friends for life" people said. I wondered what they really meant. Even i have used this phrase off handedly but never understood the real meaning of it. Yesterday i did. Yesterday i did mainly because i really didnt think i had made the so called friends for life in the four years at VESIT; of course except for two or three.
Brian called out my name to go and speak. I really didnt want to. 'Coz i didnt have the things that people wanted to hear in the first place. Also, it would have made me feel even worse to tell what i felt when I seemed to be the only one feeling this way. Not that not talkin about it would have made me feel better. But there is this thing about "Talking about what you feel". It brings your feelings which are at the back of your mind to the forefront. And these feelings stare right at you and you will have to face them. So, i refused to speak.
Then Ram came up and said he would sing a few lines. The song was obvious, for the occasion. 'Pal' - Hum rahein ya na rahein kal...Yaad aayenge yeh pal. My eyes filled up with tears. I didnt bother to wipe them off. I didnt want to. The song has magic in it. There is something out of the world about this song, that every time i listen to it, it triggers a flash back of the wonderful moments ive had with my close friends. But, this time it was rather different. Heart breakingly different. Nothing really flashed in front of me. I did have a good time in the four years. But they were not memorable. I do not know the reasons. I do not dare to start thinking abt the reasons. I know it will make me feel miserable.
I know one thing for sure. These four years have been good! Just good! Not wonderful, life changing or memorable...these four years have taught me some important lessons in life that i am sure i will remember in future. I have made many friends. A Few good friends. One best friend. These four years have also given me my dearest buddy. Well!!!I do not have complaints. I am more than happy to leave college with a few great friends by my side. They are in true sense, "friends for life"...
Brian called out my name to go and speak. I really didnt want to. 'Coz i didnt have the things that people wanted to hear in the first place. Also, it would have made me feel even worse to tell what i felt when I seemed to be the only one feeling this way. Not that not talkin about it would have made me feel better. But there is this thing about "Talking about what you feel". It brings your feelings which are at the back of your mind to the forefront. And these feelings stare right at you and you will have to face them. So, i refused to speak.
Then Ram came up and said he would sing a few lines. The song was obvious, for the occasion. 'Pal' - Hum rahein ya na rahein kal...Yaad aayenge yeh pal. My eyes filled up with tears. I didnt bother to wipe them off. I didnt want to. The song has magic in it. There is something out of the world about this song, that every time i listen to it, it triggers a flash back of the wonderful moments ive had with my close friends. But, this time it was rather different. Heart breakingly different. Nothing really flashed in front of me. I did have a good time in the four years. But they were not memorable. I do not know the reasons. I do not dare to start thinking abt the reasons. I know it will make me feel miserable.
I know one thing for sure. These four years have been good! Just good! Not wonderful, life changing or memorable...these four years have taught me some important lessons in life that i am sure i will remember in future. I have made many friends. A Few good friends. One best friend. These four years have also given me my dearest buddy. Well!!!I do not have complaints. I am more than happy to leave college with a few great friends by my side. They are in true sense, "friends for life"...
My dearest Brother
It was 3 in the afternoon. Blistering heat. Wobbly auto rikhshaw, the kind that can seat 6 people in one. Six of us friends heading for alibaug. Things were getting quiter as we ran out of ideas to play or talk about something. Sriram pops a question to us. What are the 3 BEST things that happened to you in these four years in VESIT. Almost instantaneously, a name flashed in front of my eyes...'Seshu' it read...
Seshadri NArasimhan - Not so Tall. Only bones and skin, No flesh. Typical madrasi looking. Noticeable glasses. Scholarly looks...Well this is the description of his which will not do any justice to the gem of a person that he is.
I met him for the first time in the first SFMC meeting in my second year. He comes across as an intelligent and caring person to everyone. That is how even i felt. I interacted quite a bit with him professionally regarding SFMC work with him in the second year. I never realised that a wonderful friendship was in the making. I found the kind of a friend that i think i was sub conciously looking out for. At the end of the second year, I tied him a Rakhi and officially made him my brother. And for the record...He didnt give me any gift. Not even a Chocolate!!!
"Seshu, Waste hai tu".
By the way. I keep saying this to him quite often. :) But what i really mean when i say is...
"I love you brother"...
You can just stop loving this guy...
He can read my pulse. Yes! he really can. He always knows the mood that i am in. At times when even my mom doesnt know that something is bothering me, seshu knows. He would deligently come into the class, stand besides my bench and look at me for a moment. I now what he is going to say next. And even he knows that i know!! But I behave like i am toally unaware of his intentions. I look at him stupidly and say an artificially cheerful "HI SESHU"... He would throw one of his "Shut up Stupid" looks and say what i know he is going to say "Aparna, Bahar Chal"...Well, sitting on the bench out side my class starts the counselling session. I have ALWAYS felt better after speaking to him.
We discuss almost everything under the sun... My deepest fears, stupidest ideas and craziest fantasies find reason with him. Something spectacular about this guy is that he says what we want to hear. 100% of the times, we are in tune. He understands exactly what i feel and says exactly the things i want to hear.
The third year, the most important year of our friendship, saw the both of us taking up very important posts in our college society SFMC. Through out the year, he has been by my side, telling me what i should be doing and what i should stay away from and appreciating my work. He has been my best critic too! He has been my greatest support on my most miserable days and has always come to me with his problems looking for support from me. Yes, we have had some misunderstandings, but very few of them, and I know for sure that these episodes have only strengthened our friendship.
That year, during Raksha Bandhan, i tied him a rakhi again, but this time I really wasnt expecting anything from him. And as usual he said, "Mere paas tujhe dene ke liye kuch nahi hai re!!" And for a change, i was not too upset at this. Coz i really didnt want anything FROM him. I just wanted him to be my side as always. That day, there was a surprise awaiting me in my mail box. It was a poem written by him for me. A simple yet beautiful poem. I would have read it atleast a hundred times that day and i continue to read it now and then. It makes me feel special. It was then that i came to know of yet another talent of my brother...He was a POET, and a really good one too!!! :):)
Three years of long chats and discussions in the corridors of VESIT, crying on each other's shoulder, scolding each other for some stupid mistakes and i know this is just the begining of our friendship. I know we have a long way to go. I know that i wont let go off him, succumbing to the geological barriers that may come between us. But still there is this fear... Fear of not having him by my side at all times...(come on, i have to be practical).
I would like Time to take a rewind, taking me three years back...I would gladly relive these three years just for one reason and it is him.
I will miss you brother...
P.S. : These lines still do not do justice to the gem of a person that he is.
Seshadri NArasimhan - Not so Tall. Only bones and skin, No flesh. Typical madrasi looking. Noticeable glasses. Scholarly looks...Well this is the description of his which will not do any justice to the gem of a person that he is.
I met him for the first time in the first SFMC meeting in my second year. He comes across as an intelligent and caring person to everyone. That is how even i felt. I interacted quite a bit with him professionally regarding SFMC work with him in the second year. I never realised that a wonderful friendship was in the making. I found the kind of a friend that i think i was sub conciously looking out for. At the end of the second year, I tied him a Rakhi and officially made him my brother. And for the record...He didnt give me any gift. Not even a Chocolate!!!
"Seshu, Waste hai tu".
By the way. I keep saying this to him quite often. :) But what i really mean when i say is...
"I love you brother"...
You can just stop loving this guy...
He can read my pulse. Yes! he really can. He always knows the mood that i am in. At times when even my mom doesnt know that something is bothering me, seshu knows. He would deligently come into the class, stand besides my bench and look at me for a moment. I now what he is going to say next. And even he knows that i know!! But I behave like i am toally unaware of his intentions. I look at him stupidly and say an artificially cheerful "HI SESHU"... He would throw one of his "Shut up Stupid" looks and say what i know he is going to say "Aparna, Bahar Chal"...Well, sitting on the bench out side my class starts the counselling session. I have ALWAYS felt better after speaking to him.
We discuss almost everything under the sun... My deepest fears, stupidest ideas and craziest fantasies find reason with him. Something spectacular about this guy is that he says what we want to hear. 100% of the times, we are in tune. He understands exactly what i feel and says exactly the things i want to hear.
The third year, the most important year of our friendship, saw the both of us taking up very important posts in our college society SFMC. Through out the year, he has been by my side, telling me what i should be doing and what i should stay away from and appreciating my work. He has been my best critic too! He has been my greatest support on my most miserable days and has always come to me with his problems looking for support from me. Yes, we have had some misunderstandings, but very few of them, and I know for sure that these episodes have only strengthened our friendship.
That year, during Raksha Bandhan, i tied him a rakhi again, but this time I really wasnt expecting anything from him. And as usual he said, "Mere paas tujhe dene ke liye kuch nahi hai re!!" And for a change, i was not too upset at this. Coz i really didnt want anything FROM him. I just wanted him to be my side as always. That day, there was a surprise awaiting me in my mail box. It was a poem written by him for me. A simple yet beautiful poem. I would have read it atleast a hundred times that day and i continue to read it now and then. It makes me feel special. It was then that i came to know of yet another talent of my brother...He was a POET, and a really good one too!!! :):)
Three years of long chats and discussions in the corridors of VESIT, crying on each other's shoulder, scolding each other for some stupid mistakes and i know this is just the begining of our friendship. I know we have a long way to go. I know that i wont let go off him, succumbing to the geological barriers that may come between us. But still there is this fear... Fear of not having him by my side at all times...(come on, i have to be practical).
I would like Time to take a rewind, taking me three years back...I would gladly relive these three years just for one reason and it is him.
I will miss you brother...
P.S. : These lines still do not do justice to the gem of a person that he is.
Saturday, April 08, 2006
From the Vishy diaries - MAT[H]RIX 2006
It is the 22nd of March, 2006. Having treated myself to a well deserved feast ordered from the local restaurant, I am now sitting in my depressingly sultry bedroom. There is no electricity, the phone line is down and it is only a matter of time before the charge on my cellphone gives out.
Cut off from the outside world, I hark back to 24 hours earlier.
It was 12.45 PM on the 21st, and we were putting the final touches to the organizing of our annual SFMC symposium, MAT[H]RIX 2006. At that moment, I could not have imagined that 24 hours hence, I would be sitting in an airless room, doing absolutely nothing...
Things were going on perfectly more or less, considering that only some minor preparatory JHOLS had occurred. I was breathing very easy, especially if you take into account the fact that the world's ("world" here, means the community of VESIT, my seniors, pals and immediate family) collective eyes were focused on my slender frame, waiting for me to prove my worth as a GS. The symposium was supposed to be the culmination of the yearlong activities of the society, a society for which (I modestly admit, based on unabashed reviews from near and dear ones) I had worked tirelessly with the council, and in doing so, had whittled my once wellbuilt frame to a framework of bones. [Justifiably so, for organizing is not my forte.]
And then, the sky fell down...
We realised that the banner we had ordered to be made, would not arrive soon enough, and I had to break open the locker[whose key I had irresponsibly lost] to access the previous banner. AND the mike wasnt working.
As if that wasnt enough, a miscommunication had led to two hundred and fifty dusty, ragged SFMC members crowding the entrance to the venue [the auditorium] before things could be readied and the audience ushered in.
I have never really found myself to be in a pressure situation. All I have done is read accounts of it. In novels,etc. "All the things they teach you, Be calm, breathe easy, etc...all these instructions fly out of your head...Your brain seems to be in limbo, just accepting information without processing it." This was a line I'd read in some novel.
Well, I happen to think this is crap. This WAS a pressure situation. I was IN it. And i must say i handled it pretty well. 5 council members were Gheraaoing me, screaming information at the top of their voices, To complicate matters, the ongoing sound testing and "Hello - Hello"s, with the racket of an overeager audience at the doors, made decision-making pretty difficult.
I actually remember feeling short of breath. Things were falling apart. Aparna BS was nowhere to be seen. The lights were becoming overbright.
I took a deep breath, and dissociated myself from the hubbub. A shrug of the shoulders helped things along. Then I began dealing with things one at a time, according to a priority which had automatically formed in my mind. 2 people were sent to find the technician and have the mike fixed.4 were posted on each door to take care of the burgeoning crowd. Things started to look better. To tell the truth, the sight of the members being systematically let in was a sight for sore eyes. But one thing I learnt was, management is a mind game.
The start of the symposium was thankfully uneventful, owing to a great TE and notably SE council.[Discussion about them in a later post] Marked only by a lot of running about to arrange the freely given folders and CD pouches in their proper place. Some hiccoughs were caused by a delay in the arrival of the food during the first break. The canteen guy kept underestimating the sheer stress that 250 hungry and bored audience members can put on a canteen's food production speed. He kept refilling each basket of food late, so that pileups at the food counter became common.
In between food breaks, I got a breather and started to think.
This was realistically the first event that I had managed independently. As such, Aparna was present, but I could detect a hint of restraint. Maybe I am mistaken, but if such restraint on her part ever existed, it was well made, because I finally got a taste of how it was REALLY done, about the liters of sweat that went into an event. For some reason, I also relished the feeling of being the cynosure, of being asked for details, etc. The feeling that if I suddenly absented myself from the proceedings, the whole event would come crashing down on its knees.
The voice of a fellow council member jolted me back to reality. Easy, Vishy, I reminded myself. The event is not yet over. But who says power is NOT seductive....
I later chanced upon the SFMC diary that I had maintained, in which, the night before, I had made an intricate schedule of jobs along with people responsible. I am glad to say that I did not write down a word during the entire symposium. I even referred to it only once or twice. Astonishing, especially when you take into account the fact that I have this obsession with writing things down. And THAT reinforces my belief that management is a mind game....
With the reality of affairs evident during the first lunch break, we made things a little more organized during the second break. This time, problem areas were identified and we learnt from our mistakes.
With the end of the symposium in sight, I should have felt depressed, but the truth is I was still in High-Adrenaline mode. No time to feel That feeling of emptiness or That feeling of nostalgia etc etc....Sometimes the movies and books hype it up.
The last of the members dispersed with a full stomach as well as bag full of goodies. And finally we council members sat down for our dinner.
And then it struck me...
The symposium was over. The one event which defined the society was over. And with it, my role for the Society was almost finished for the Semester.
Almost Finished...
Where had the sem gone? I wondered, in a quiet moment of reflection. It was as if last week ,that I got the message on my cellphone, "you have been selected as the General Secretary..."
It was like 4 days ago, that I had felt the insecurities that are part and parcel of any responsibility...it was yesterday that I heaved a sigh of relief that Stock Market had gone well...WHEN did it all happen?
Then I realised that maybe this was what they meant...maybe this was what the 20-something ex-students meant when they told us, with a faraway, moist look in their eyes, "Time flew when we had fun..."
We worked like heaven, but we also had fun. Period.
Cut off from the outside world, I hark back to 24 hours earlier.
It was 12.45 PM on the 21st, and we were putting the final touches to the organizing of our annual SFMC symposium, MAT[H]RIX 2006. At that moment, I could not have imagined that 24 hours hence, I would be sitting in an airless room, doing absolutely nothing...
Things were going on perfectly more or less, considering that only some minor preparatory JHOLS had occurred. I was breathing very easy, especially if you take into account the fact that the world's ("world" here, means the community of VESIT, my seniors, pals and immediate family) collective eyes were focused on my slender frame, waiting for me to prove my worth as a GS. The symposium was supposed to be the culmination of the yearlong activities of the society, a society for which (I modestly admit, based on unabashed reviews from near and dear ones) I had worked tirelessly with the council, and in doing so, had whittled my once wellbuilt frame to a framework of bones. [Justifiably so, for organizing is not my forte.]
And then, the sky fell down...
We realised that the banner we had ordered to be made, would not arrive soon enough, and I had to break open the locker[whose key I had irresponsibly lost] to access the previous banner. AND the mike wasnt working.
As if that wasnt enough, a miscommunication had led to two hundred and fifty dusty, ragged SFMC members crowding the entrance to the venue [the auditorium] before things could be readied and the audience ushered in.
I have never really found myself to be in a pressure situation. All I have done is read accounts of it. In novels,etc. "All the things they teach you, Be calm, breathe easy, etc...all these instructions fly out of your head...Your brain seems to be in limbo, just accepting information without processing it." This was a line I'd read in some novel.
Well, I happen to think this is crap. This WAS a pressure situation. I was IN it. And i must say i handled it pretty well. 5 council members were Gheraaoing me, screaming information at the top of their voices, To complicate matters, the ongoing sound testing and "Hello - Hello"s, with the racket of an overeager audience at the doors, made decision-making pretty difficult.
I actually remember feeling short of breath. Things were falling apart. Aparna BS was nowhere to be seen. The lights were becoming overbright.
I took a deep breath, and dissociated myself from the hubbub. A shrug of the shoulders helped things along. Then I began dealing with things one at a time, according to a priority which had automatically formed in my mind. 2 people were sent to find the technician and have the mike fixed.4 were posted on each door to take care of the burgeoning crowd. Things started to look better. To tell the truth, the sight of the members being systematically let in was a sight for sore eyes. But one thing I learnt was, management is a mind game.
The start of the symposium was thankfully uneventful, owing to a great TE and notably SE council.[Discussion about them in a later post] Marked only by a lot of running about to arrange the freely given folders and CD pouches in their proper place. Some hiccoughs were caused by a delay in the arrival of the food during the first break. The canteen guy kept underestimating the sheer stress that 250 hungry and bored audience members can put on a canteen's food production speed. He kept refilling each basket of food late, so that pileups at the food counter became common.
In between food breaks, I got a breather and started to think.
This was realistically the first event that I had managed independently. As such, Aparna was present, but I could detect a hint of restraint. Maybe I am mistaken, but if such restraint on her part ever existed, it was well made, because I finally got a taste of how it was REALLY done, about the liters of sweat that went into an event. For some reason, I also relished the feeling of being the cynosure, of being asked for details, etc. The feeling that if I suddenly absented myself from the proceedings, the whole event would come crashing down on its knees.
The voice of a fellow council member jolted me back to reality. Easy, Vishy, I reminded myself. The event is not yet over. But who says power is NOT seductive....
I later chanced upon the SFMC diary that I had maintained, in which, the night before, I had made an intricate schedule of jobs along with people responsible. I am glad to say that I did not write down a word during the entire symposium. I even referred to it only once or twice. Astonishing, especially when you take into account the fact that I have this obsession with writing things down. And THAT reinforces my belief that management is a mind game....
With the reality of affairs evident during the first lunch break, we made things a little more organized during the second break. This time, problem areas were identified and we learnt from our mistakes.
With the end of the symposium in sight, I should have felt depressed, but the truth is I was still in High-Adrenaline mode. No time to feel That feeling of emptiness or That feeling of nostalgia etc etc....Sometimes the movies and books hype it up.
The last of the members dispersed with a full stomach as well as bag full of goodies. And finally we council members sat down for our dinner.
And then it struck me...
The symposium was over. The one event which defined the society was over. And with it, my role for the Society was almost finished for the Semester.
Almost Finished...
Where had the sem gone? I wondered, in a quiet moment of reflection. It was as if last week ,that I got the message on my cellphone, "you have been selected as the General Secretary..."
It was like 4 days ago, that I had felt the insecurities that are part and parcel of any responsibility...it was yesterday that I heaved a sigh of relief that Stock Market had gone well...WHEN did it all happen?
Then I realised that maybe this was what they meant...maybe this was what the 20-something ex-students meant when they told us, with a faraway, moist look in their eyes, "Time flew when we had fun..."
We worked like heaven, but we also had fun. Period.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
The Ocean Within...
The mind is like a monkey jumping from one tree top to the other. Our thoughts are like the trees that the monkey jumps onto. And eternal happiness is the moments we feel when the mind is thoughtless.
It is from this ocean of thoughts - the ocean within, that i bring out a few waves on to this blog...
It is from this ocean of thoughts - the ocean within, that i bring out a few waves on to this blog...
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